Number One (and a Half)
by KBeckett0334
Summary: "He will never get tired of nights like this." Post-ep for 5x17 and that amazing bucket list. T for safety.


**A/N: Post-ep for 5x17. Because I couldn't stop thinking about his number one.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the DVDs and books.**

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He will never get tired of nights like this – the soft feel of her body in his arms, her warm breath against his neck, the way that the nonstop New York noise seems to gradually fade away until they're the only two people in existence.

He wants to stay here forever.

Kate had told him after their very first case that he had no idea how good they would be together, and she was right – he'd been completely clueless. But it's not just the sex that had turned out to be amazingly mind-blowing. It's the way that his spirits immediately lift just by seeing her walk into the room. It's how he can feel his heart swell almost to the point of bursting every time she shows him that lovely smile that she reserves just for him. And it's the beauty in the fact that they so very rarely need words, often choosing to spend parts of their nights just lying together in silence and soaking each other in.

It's amazing – _she's_ amazing – and there are still days where it overwhelms him, where he can barely believe that she's here and she's his and he can touch her and kiss her and make love to her like nothing else in the world matters as much as the feeling of her skin pressed up against his.

And that's why he needs these moments, needs to have the time to hold her and watch her sleep, to trace the planes of her face with the tip of his fingers – like pen on paper – and just convince himself that this is _real._

Because, oh, he loves her.

And that overwhelms him sometimes too.

She hasn't returned the sentiment yet, but that doesn't bother him in the slightest. After all, he can see it written all over her face most days, like tonight when she found out what was number one on his bucket list.

Now that he thinks about it, it really has been almost exactly three years since he started that list. It had originated not long after the mummy case when he'd thought he was cursed and Beckett started dating Schlemming. He'd been a little put out at the time, his confidence in their eventual relationship wavering, and he'd needed something – anything – to help him regain some of that confidence.

His recent near death experience with the mummy curse had gotten him thinking about creating a bucket list, and when he finally decided to write it down, he didn't even have to give a second thought as to what would be on the top of his list.

_Be with Kate._

Writing it there gave him hope. It made him _believe._ By putting it down in ink, he was making himself a promise that it would happen. Someday, it would happen.

And now they're here and it's a million times better than he even imagined. (And, boy, did he imagine.)

She shifts against him then, her hand sliding across his chest as she mumbles in her sleep and eases herself closer to him, burying her face in his neck. He can feel her breath brushing against his skin as she heaves a sigh and murmurs, "Castle…"

His own breath catches at the sound of the unabashed and sheer _joy _he hears in that single word, his throat then closing up when he feels her smile against him, nuzzling even closer.

He waits to see if she'll say anything more (as she sometimes does in her sleep) but it's not long before she settles and, after a handful of minutes, he finds he can breathe again.

Kate. His Kate.

He makes her happy.

And he doesn't know why, doesn't know what makes him so special, but he does know that he never wants to stop.

He reaches out slowly with his right arm, not wanting to wake her, and digs around in the nightstand by the side of the bed. When he finds his idea notebook and a pen, he quietly pulls them out, relinquishing his grip on her shoulders so that he can flip through the book with two hands until he finds what he's looking for.

The bucket list had found its way back to its original home this morning after a few days of moving around the loft. He'd caught Kate looking at it a few times, smiling to herself. He'd never said anything when he did, afraid that her smile would disappear in embarrassment, but he had managed to snap a picture of her once, and it now greets him every time he uses his phone.

He unfolds the list, tracing its worn and softened edges, a sort of metaphor for how much things have changed since he first decided to put his dreams down on paper.

He writes another one now, crossing out number one and squeezing in two words underneath it – two words that should scare him, but, with Kate's smile still pressed into his skin, come so easily.

_1. Be with Kate_

_1 ½. Marry her_

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**A/N: I've been meaning to write something new sooner, but life got in the way again along with a terrible case of writer's block. I have another oneshot that should be coming within the next week as well as an AU that may or may not happen (I'm still working things out). In the meantime, feel free to follow me on Tumblr (seeker15 dot tumblr dot com) for Castle/Casketty goodness as well as fanfic updates (eventually, when I finally figure out how to post them). Also, feel free to send me prompts, either on Tumblr or here. Like I said, I don't have too much lined up and really want to keep myself writing, so if there's anything that you're dying to see in a fic, let me know and I'll see what I can do!**

**Okay. I think that's it. Hope you all enjoyed!**


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